


Consequences of a One Night Stand

by GornsAndBees



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Auror Harry Potter, Auror Ron Weasley, Draco Malfoy & Pansy Parkinson Friendship, Gay Draco Malfoy, Gen, Not Epilogue Compliant, POV Draco Malfoy, Swearing, Young adults actually acting like it, draco/omc is just mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-08-07 21:23:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16416197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GornsAndBees/pseuds/GornsAndBees
Summary: After the war, Draco Malfoy gets a flat in muggle London. Harry Potter and Ron Weasley become aurors.Sometimes run-ins are inevitable. Draco freaks out about it. Or: the Hogwarts reunion no-one asked for.





	Consequences of a One Night Stand

**Author's Note:**

> I've never actually written any HP fanfic before although I've read *tonnes.* This just, kind of happened 0_0
> 
> Ron isn't shown in a great light in this fic, but that's just bc it's Draco's POV, and there's no outright bashing. (I love Ron.)
> 
> In this scenario the ministry has put traces on former/ suspected Death Eaters after the war to monitor potentially dangerous activity. Since accidental breakages of the Statute of Secrecy happen all the time, newly trained Aurors are sent to situations which are deemed to be probably harmless.

Draco Malfoy has never been more embarrassed in his life. This is ridiculous.  All he’d _wanted_ was to spend the night with someone who wouldn’t flinch at the sight of his forearm.  Was that really too much to ask? He’d never been accused of being a _good_ person but surely no-one deserved _this_.

 

Harry Potter, _Harry fucking Potter_ and his sidekick Weasley are here, _in his flat_ , _interrogating_ him. Oh merlin he’s _going to get arrested_.

 

It wasn’t even him who broke the damn Statute but this is _his_ flat and it was _his_ muggle and he’s the one with the Dark Mark. Potter and Weasley are just barely done with training and he doesn’t trust either of them not to hold their history against him. Not that he’d trust any Aurors with that.

 

What if he gets sent to Azkaban? His mother will never forgive him. What if he has to _talk to his father?_

 

So here he is on the sofa in his muggle flat, next to his best friend in the world who doesn’t even have the good sense to look guilty despite this being _all her fault_.

 

“So the facts as we understand them,” says Potter, “are that you, Pansy Parkinson, used a _lumos_ charm in the presence of a muggle at 5:30am on the morning of Thursday the 14 th of July, here in the residence of Draco Malfoy.”

 

He looks up from where he’s sitting, on one of the armchairs opposite him and Pansy.

 

“That’s right, is it?”

 

“Yes.” Answers Pansy, “But only because I didn’t see him at first, and I obliviated him as soon as I did.” 

 

“Very thoughtful of you.” Weasley comments, in a way that is probably meant to seem threatening. Draco tries not to roll his eyes.

 

“And this muggle’s name was...?” Potter interrupts, still for some reason acting professional.

 

Pansy looks at Draco.

 

“Brian.” Draco offers, trying to sound scathing.

 

No-one speaks for a minute.

 

Potter looks up from the parchment he’s writing this down on, using Draco’s antique coffee table as a surface.

 

“Brian...?” He raises his eyebrows at Draco.

 

Draco tries not to glare. Being hostile won’t make it less likely that he gets arrested.

Potter sighs, “Look,” he puts down the pen, “We don’t want to take up too much of your time. I’m sure this is just a misunderstanding – but we’re going to need you to cooperate with us alright?”

 

Oh. Oh _nooo_. This is. _This is Good Cop fucking Bad Cop._ How?? Exactly? is he supposed to deal with this???

 

Draco clenches his teeth. He will not freak out about this. He will get through this interrogation without getting arrested, and then he will _block this whole ridiculous farce from his memory._

 

“I am not aware of his surname.”

 

Potter frowns lightly but writes this down.

 

“So,” starts Weasley, who still, despite his Auror training, appears to be incurably dense. “A Mr. _Malfoy_ took a muggle, _Brian_ , back to his place of residence, without taking the proper precautions to ensure the statute of secrecy was not broken. Is that correct?”

 

Draco clenches his teeth harder to stop himself from rolling his eyes. Honestly. Gryffindors should not attempt subtlety. Weasley looks at Draco innocently from the armchair next to Potter.

 

“As I said,” Draco hisses, “I was unaware that Pansy would be here this morning. And I had informed her that she should be discreet as there might be muggles here.”

 

Potter looks to Pansy for confirmation. “Is this true, Miss Parkinson?” He asks calmly.

 

Pansy takes a second to answer. “Ye—es, I just,” she hesitates, pursing her lips, “I assumed he meant in the daytime. You know, landlords and neighbours and that, this is a muggle flat after all, so I didn’t bother to be discreet at five thirty in the _morning_.”  

 

“Speaking of which,” chimes in Weasley, “what were you doing with a muggle at five AM?”

 

Malfoy takes in a breath and starts speaking, slowly, lest he do something awful like trip over his words or _blush._ “I had invited him to stay at my flat overnight.” He ends up saying. Simple, and true. If they want more details they’ll have to ask for them.

 

“Yes, but why—?” Weasley starts, but Potter cuts in.

 

“I think I understand what’s going on here.” He says, looking Draco right in the eyes for the first time since they’d gotten here. He looks like he’s trying not to smile. _Damn_. That means he’s figured out what happened and is _enjoying_ this. On the plus side it also probably means he doesn’t think he and Pansy are doing anything (intentionally) illegal, as Weasley clearly does.

 

Weasley frowns at Potter, “What—?” He starts to say, before Potter cuts him off again.

 

“Trust me.” Potter says, before turning to Pansy. She seems to have figured out she isn’t going to get in trouble, and now just looks bored. She’ll be checking her manicure for chips any minute now.

 

“Okay Miss Parkinson, just make sure this doesn’t happen again. If it does, we’ll have to take further action. Do you understand?”

 

“Yes, yes of course.” She replies, waving one hand at him dismissively and while she holds the other up to the light to inspect her nail varnish. _Right on cue_.

 

Potter frowns. “I’m sure you understand that breaking the statute of secrecy is an extremely serious offence, Miss Parkinson.” He says, coldly.

 

She looks up, surprised by his sudden sincerity, “Of course. I’m just sure that it won’t happen again.” She smiles, in a way that would be warm if it wasn’t so obviously insincere. “I understand what Draco meant now when he told me not to use magic here.”

 

“Good.” Potter replies, still unimpressed, although not as much as Weasley, who seems to have abandoned professionalism in favour of scowling at Draco, in a way that he probably thinks is threatening.

 

Potter looks at back Draco and doesn’t smile, although his eyes light up in amusement, “Perhaps you ought to have some sort of signal. You know, a tie in the fireplace means there’s a muggle round.”

 

 _Fuck. You._ “Good idea.” He replies, his voice deliberately calm.

 

Potter clenches his jaw in a way that makes it look like he’s trying to avoid laughing. _Curse him._

 

“Well, since that’s in order we’ll be on our way.” He’s definitely smirking now, the bastard, “Come on, Ron.”

 

They apparate away and Draco lets his head sink into his hands, groaning.

 

“Do these look even to you?” Pansy asks, unfazed by his misery. “It’s just my usual stylist was away yesterday and I’m just not sure about her replacement.”

 

Draco sighs. “Your usual stylist has _no_ taste. This one isn’t as neat, but, the colour is far better on you. Now could you _please_ either go away or bring me some chocolate I am _trying_ to _sulk_.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is written in my headcanon verse for which I have several *long* fics planned which will probably never be written. This scene came to me one day, I thought it was hilarious and it's been bugging me ever since.
> 
> For those who are interested, the verse centres largely on a redemption-arc for Draco and an exploration of his character and relationships with his parents and friends that was never really present in the books. Draco and Hermione become close friends, and Drarry is endgame, but none of that really matters for this fic.
> 
> Please let me know if you enjoyed this! I'm terrible at replying to comments consistently but I do read and enjoy all of them :)


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